Twas the third week in August, when all through the malls
No shoppers were stirring, no decking the halls
Summer clothes were on clearance, Halloween stuff on sale
Retailers were worried, their businesses could fail.
Back to school shoppers had spent all their cash
The tax free weekend, drew them out in a dash
The stores' bottom lines were feeling the pinch
But they had an idea, worthy of a Grinch.
We'll start Christmas early; it's just a white lie
We already have sales called Christmas in July
The bean counters' eyes lit up with a flash
They drooled over the thought of early holiday cash.
So they put out their wares, overflowing the shelves
While it's still vacation time, for all Santa's elves
Their doors flew open, expecting the crowds
But most shoppers just shouted, for cryin' out loud.
It's still summertime, stop playing jingle bells
I'm wearing shorts, t-shirts, it's hotter than… a really hot place
Don't tell me I'll save, or how little I'll pay
Have you no shame, it's not even Labor Day.
So please don't give in, to the temptation to shop
Let's make this sales gimmick a major flop
If we don't stop them here, you know what they'll try
You'll be eating Thanksgiving turkey on the Fourth of July!
© 2016 Cox Media Group.